A Quick Update

I felt it was about time I sat down & wrote something in here as it has been sometime.

Well life hasn’t been too bad to me all round. There’s been the odd up & down but I’ve dealt with them in my stride.

I’ve been having some long chats online & on the phone, mainly to my eldest son & my daughter. My other son now lives at his girlfriends, now only returning home occasionally much to my eldest son & daughter disgruntlement. But teenagers are as they are.

I love chatting with my daughter, we can share so many stories & she understands about my depression, definitely a step forward. Also we share a lot of things in common. She’s so loving & caring & has happily accepted Jamie as her “step daddy” which is a definite bonus.

My eldest son has been having a lot of problems with different things but we helped out as much as we could. Again I love having my chats with him. He & Jamie pretty much like the same things so no doubt when they do get to meet they’ll have plenty to say….. Both of them can a talk a lot!!!!

My younger son, well I only to get to talk to him when he’s online. I think he

finds it a bit hard talking with me as me leaving hit him the hardest & he came quite introverted. Also with him living at his girlfriends Mothers & working it isn’t always that easy. Plus he finds it easier to talk online.

So that’s my`children’s news in brief.

Jamie is now writing a blog about his past experiences but he’s writing them rap style. It’s amazing how quickly he does them. If you want to check them out you’ll find it at http://jamiefive.blogspot.com/.

I’ve not been sleeping too well again but Jamie sits up with me to keep me company, making me cups of tea when needed. I don’t know what ’d do without him.

On the whole life has been good for me. I’ve enjoyed doing the things that I’ve done.

I had a lovely day out last Tuesday & went to visit one of my oldest friends DK. It was good to catch up & a laugh. I even let her take a few photos of me. We are actually going to have a day where we spend a day of him taking different photos of me, which I’m looking forward to. Hopefully they’ll be some decent ones that I’ll be able to put up on here.

I’m pleased to say that one of my dearest friends depression seems to have lifted so looking forward to catching up with her. On a sadder note two of my friends are desperately hurting, both in different ways but my thoughts are with them.

Talking of friends I’ve been discovering who my real friends are. I’m tired of those who use me & just want me there for their convenience, yet when I need them they’re nowhere to been seen. So I’ve binned them for the time being & see how it feels when I ignore them & see if they get the idea.

It may seem slightly childish but this has been going on with these two particular friends for years & I just got tired of it. Anyway I’ll just have to wait & see what happens.

My biggest thing at the moment is trying to learn to be happy with myself, in everyway. Not an easy thing for me cos I’ve always been good at beating myself up over one thing or another. However I’m getting a little better at it as time goes on.

One day I might actually be able to say that I am happy with who I am & see what other people see in me, but it’s going to take some time.

Anyway enough for now folks. Thanks for reading xx